It seems so, because almost every one of us once realises that the man does not understand the mind. Why and to establish with him personal or business contact can be very difficult. Hence - quarrels, conflicts, tensions in the relationship. From here - unhappy marriages, dissatisfaction, hostility, broken hearts and loneliness. And how to understand a man or a guy, general psychology does not prompt.
However, the point is most likely not that we, women, come from Venus. And they are men from Mars. The reason for the differences between the sexes is in the difference of worldviews and differences in the perception of reality. If we are aware of these features of male perception, then we will certainly be able to choose a key to the representatives of the stronger sex.
And bypass, thanks to this, acute angles in the relationship, eliminating the lion’s share of quarrels and misunderstandings. Women are wise creatures. They are able to feel and understand well their loved ones. But only if they have an idea of ??what male psychology is. Otherwise we become touchy, overly demanding, intolerable.
Yes, the mind does not understand a man, if you do not know how he thinks and what he means when he says this or that phrase. Ignorance in this matter generates a lot of conflict and leads to continuous misunderstandings in communicating with loved ones. So let's at least partially eliminate the gap in our knowledge of male psychology and try to understand a man. Let's start?
Men language
Strangely enough, but even when a man and a woman in life use the same dialect, they still speak different languages. According to linguistic researchers, in ancient times, representatives of both sexes were well aware of this. Due to which they understood each other perfectly. However, over time, both of them either forgot about language differences, or ceased to reckon with them.
However, this situation today is not everywhere. For example, in Japan, a similar language difference is provided not only by grammatical rules, but also by etiquette requirements. However, it’s not just declensions, pronouns, endings, prefixes and suffixes. The point, above all, is that men and women express their opinions and experiences in different ways. It’s easy to make sure. It is enough to ask the boy and the girl to retell some fairy tale. And immediately there will be a noticeable big difference between the “girlish” and “boyish” variants. Everything is simple - their psychology even in childhood is already different!
Maybe it is laid in early childhood, because we raise our children in accordance with their sex? But it is also likely that the roots of the differences are in the peculiarities of the psyche and genetic memory. It’s hard to say for sure. The fact remains that we speak different languages.
And if male and female language were taught at school in sex education classes, many of the conflicts between men and women could have been avoided, because it would be much easier to understand a man. But, alas, in such lessons they are now taught anything, even virtuoso sex, but not the skill of communicating with the opposite sex.
As a result, the science of such communication, each person comprehends independently through trial, error and stuffing cones. Yes, it is still good, if it wants to comprehend, otherwise it is not, it does not want to! And all his life comes on the same rake, getting on his forehead again and again. And then, when on a rake it is annoying to stagnate, or it closes, or begins to negatively treat all, without exception, representatives of the opposite sex. They say they are all so-so, so there can be no mutual understanding!
If for men the main thing is external action, then for women it is the inner world of emotions. So how then can we express our thoughts and feelings in the same way? While he is thinking about how to prevent a global coup, she puzzles over what to cook for dinner. While he is thinking about the consequences of a revolution in some country, she is looking for options to lose weight. He was puzzled by the global crisis, she was a new fur coat, and so on. Women generally think more narrowly and specifically than men. Men can overlook scattered socks, dirty cups, cobwebs in the corner, women see it all at once, without straining attention. And, without straining thinking, they already know what to do with such a disgrace.
Conclusion: if a man does not understand the mind, then men and women cannot project their own perception of the world onto each other. These are views on reality from a different angle, coinciding only at certain points.
Psychologically, we are not similar, so you should not be disappointed, taking this dissimilarity as a reluctance to understand and fruitfully build relationships. It is better to take into account that men are not like us, and adjust their behavior accordingly. And as long as male psychology remains a mystery to you, you simply cannot understand it, no matter how much you desire. Let's see what it looks like.
Male phrases. How to treat them?
All of us are big inventors and are inclined to think about almost every remark thrown by our beloved ones. For example, the way back from work was not in the spirit, had dinner, frownedly threw: “I am tired!” And collapsed on the sofa in front of the TV. While he is mindlessly switching channels, an entire armada of disturbing thoughts is whirling around in our heads.
Tired ?! Why are you tired? He was not promoted, he no longer earns money, he spends as much time in the service as he did before. So why is he suddenly so tired today? Eh, nooo, a scoundrel, either hides something from the salary and does not say that they have increased the workload with the salary, or he started a mistress ...
And we also perceive the phrase “I'm tired!” As the fact that he is tired of us. After all, we have recovered almost per kilogram over the past six months and have not cooked borsch for a long time. Not cooked soup? Yeah-hh ?! And the fact that we also work and the whole house we carry is not counted ?!
Everything. It is worthwhile to think this way of the innocent phrase of your dear half - and it’s gone, it’s gone: this is female psychology. The attack on the spouse begins in order to find out for what reasons he is silently lying on the sofa and that he is not satisfied with his home. Moreover, one can only wonder and wonder what caused such a surge of aggression in the dear little wife. After all, he is really just tired. The day was hard!
Men tend to be straightforward. They themselves do not know how to hint, and do not understand hints. It is we, women, who can circle around the bush, walk in from afar, be ambiguous. And then be offended that we were not taken as it should be, did not guess the request and did not satisfy the desire. And find out the relationship with offonarevshem from a sudden attack by her husband. After all, he didn’t suspect that when we asked: “I’m a little better, dear?”, They meant that the figure was perfectly preserved! And he foolishly threw: "Yes!"
It is not worth all the forces trying to pull information from a man. We always pester them with the question of what is at your job, where have you been, waiting for them to confirm feelings and assertions of their own attractiveness. In response, we get indifferent: "Everything is in order," "I went on business," "I love you," "You look great."
And we begin to brutalize from the cold, detached intonation of answers. But what else can it be, if the thoughts of the dear are busy with the solution of a global problem and it’s not a trifle? Well, loves, loves, how much can you talk about it? All fine. There will be problems, will tell. And we look quite ourselves. This is understandable, otherwise I would have escaped long ago! Why bother with such questions again and again? Here it is, male psychology!
The main part of women for unknown reasons for some reason suspect their faithful in excessive secrecy. They, they say, never tell the truth, conceal even the little things and generally pretend to be at every turn. Of course, we are trying to expose them, bring them to clean water and make them behave sincerely. Men become nervous and angry, thereby increasing our suspicion. Still would! After all, if you are freaking out, it means that you’ve got hurt, and he is definitely guilty of something!
Now imagine such a situation. The buyer in the department store attached to the seller with a request to sell him sausage. The seller answers in amazement that they have no sausages for sale. The visitor does not calm down and continues to insist on his own - sell him a pound of amateur sausage, period! And she never wants to believe that she is simply not here. How, as a result, will the seller react to his insistence? Right. In the end, he will lose his temper and show a bore where the exit is.
Something like our attempts to convict a man of insincerity, when he has nothing to hide. What kind of reaction can you expect from someone who is insulted with disbelief? Well, do not know how the representatives of the stronger sex to discuss every little thing, because they do not notice the little things! They do not understand why an ardent confession of love is needed every hour if this fervent confession has already sounded. Yet it is clear that why repeat a hundred times?
Women, of course, like to heed the phrase "I love you," and they are ready to listen to it again and again. However, men say it with all my heart only in moments of elation. If we demand a confession several times a day, they simply give in so as not to provoke the spouse into a scandal. This alone is proof of male love. In the absence of love, would a husband strive to save the world in a family?
Well, since he loves, it means that those extra pounds do not spoil us, and we will not hear about the troubles at work once again. And about what things he decided, when absent, we will not know. Because a loving man will not upset his woman once again and will try to cope with all the issues himself - this is the psychology of a real knight.
From the point of view of representatives of the strong half of humanity, a woman should not be aware of their problems. Does she interfere in her spouse's affairs? It turns out, does not believe in his male consistency. With this, only a suitable infantile hlyupik will be put up, which is just waiting for the wife to take the decision of all the issues on herself.
In a word, if we cannot understand a man with the mind, we will act according to worldly wisdom. He stopped saying compliments and confessing his love, unshaven lounged on a sofa and scratching a growing belly? Wife need to rejoice! Because she is the only one whom the husband fully trusts and with whom he is really good. Otherwise I would not lie here, but wandered somewhere in search of adventure. Or mistress.
In general, the psychology of men is quite understandable. He calls yellow yellow, and blue blue. We can define yellow as the color of young dandelions, and replace blue with the color of the vast sea. Men will not confuse exact definition with emotion. They save both internal reserve and time. You should not worry about it, because we all mean the same thing. Let's try to understand the loved one without further ado, paying more attention to his actions. They will talk about feelings better than any, even the most beautiful phrases.
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